Thursday, June 28, 2012

"and hope does not disappoint us"

At prayer this morning (Romans 5:1-11)
Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.

For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. Indeed, rarely will anyone die for a righteous person – though perhaps for a good person someone might actually dare to die. But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us. Much more surely then, now that we have been justified by his blood, will we be saved through him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies, we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son, much more surely, having been reconciled, will we be saved by his life. But more than that, we even boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.

Paul --that is so freakin' beautiful.... (weeping in joy)!

Hey God.... it's margaret. So many things merging in prayer this morning....

It's been two weeks since I've had a funeral. That's nerve wracking. And also good. So, I'm Leaving it Lay.

The Repudiation of the Doctrine of Discovery was passed at General Convention in 2009. Now there is a call to prayer in repentance and reconciliation. I am not sure the two can be done well together by all parties. But it's a start. Still thinking about it. Picking this one up. More resources here.

I have been praying about the Affordable Health Care Act.... I didn't hold out much hope with the Supremes that we have... breaking news while I write this is that it has been upheld. I'm shocked, shocked I tell you. (snark--but real shock nonetheless). Bracing for the venting that is to come from those who see health care as a business and not as the well-being of the people. Putting this one down. For now.

Went to a day of Sun Dance yesterday. It was the sweetest prayer I've ever had at Sun Dance. I took the whole day in retreat. I really needed it. Quiet. No phone. No 'puter. Just grass, ants, spiders, wind --OMG the horses ran through the middle of the camp --it was magnificent --they were shouting horsey things on their way to the river --and the people and the dancers, who looked very strong (of course, it was the first day --they pray for the people for four days and nights without food and water). It was the sweetest --by that I mean, yes it was demanding --probably grueling for the dancers --but for the people it was the least regulated, the most comfortable... I am grateful for the day. Very. Grateful. I feel restored. My cup has been filled to overflowing. Leaving it Lay, but moving forward, restored.

And I've been pondering my habit of trying to not over-plan, keeping and leaving room for the Spirit... but, sometimes that is nerve-wracking/stressful... I have to really work at it... so, is it good or bad? --wrong words --here we go: Helpful or not helpful? Over all, I think it is helpful... much better than trying to make sure the plan goes as planned.... but stressful on someone who likes to plan, have a sure map to follow, knowing that we will get from this place to that place in this manner and this way etc, etc, etc.... I've had enough funerals and liturgies in this place to know that's just not the way it usually happens. Picking this one up.

And praying for my brother because he has just told me his wife left him... and he has a bunch of stuff going on... and my sisters and their husbands and families because their mother-in-laws have died... and my younger brother who is engulfed in addiction... and my personal stuff with some of my siblings in the manner of mother's death, and the ensuing estrangement and wondering if I strive for reconciliation will it be the same ol' dead end, and should the probability of that dead end mean I shouldn't do it any way and the demands on me to keep trying.... Hope does not disappoint us.... striving to Leave it Lay.... and pick it up... and put it down....

And praying prayers of gratitude for this time with my beloved --how lucky we are to be alive, here... and how fortunate we are to have and have had the medical care necessary for Joel to breathe and walk and talk and think....

And praying prayers of gratitude for the congregations and people I serve....

And praying prayers for those attending General Convention... wisdom, grace, generosity....

And now, to my day before me --taking Youthworks over to look at our church in Dupree --to get it opened for the congregation that is presently meeting in the community hall....

Off I go. Amen.